Home: An Invitation to Intense Becoming

September 17, 2023 • Sixteenth Sunday after Pentecost
Readings: Psalm 46:1-6 (Inclusive Bible) and Psalm 90:1 (NRSV)
Pastor Jeff Wells

[You can view the full worship video recording at: https://youtu.be/AwzhLqWTi1Q]

I love the image of God being our “dwelling place” and “refuge.” Yet, for a long time, I have been bristled at interpretations of the Bible or expressions of Christianity that imply that God is far away in some heavenly realm and that we are simply on a temporary sojourn through this life of pain and suffering, and ought to yearn for our “true home” in heaven. Also, I think the all too common definition of “home” as an unchanging place of comfort and escape is simplistic and limiting. So, today, I want to offer two complementary and intertwined understandings of “home.”

I suspect, for all of you, as for me, the ways we have defined and felt about “home” and the “places” we have found a sense of “home” have changed significantly over the course of our lives. I use the word “places” here tentatively and in quotes, which I will explain in a moment. Sometimes, though certainly not always, we experienced “home” first in our biological or adopted families. Then, as we grew into adulthood and left those “places,” we found other spaces to call “home.” We establish new “homes” with lovers, partners, spouses, friends, or by coming together in intentional communities or chosen families. Thus, over time, over the course of our days on this Earth, what we call “home” may change several times or we may even have multiple “places” that feel like home in different ways or fulfilling different needs.

As I alluded to earlier, people often define “home” as a “place” to find comfort, a space of solidity, a space one can depend on and where things always stay the same. This reminds me of the lyrics of the theme song from the old TV sitcom, “Cheers,” whose chorus says:

Sometimes you want to go
Where everybody knows your name,
and they’re always glad you came.
You wanna be where you can see,
our troubles are all the same
You wanna be where everybody knows
Your name. [1]

Here is where I want to push back on the idea of “home” as a place. I think “home” actually has little to do with physical “place” or “space” and very much to do with a nexus of relationships in which we are continually interacting, sharing, loving, learning, changing, and growing. When they are nurtured and lived into well, our relationships provide a sense of solid ground for us to stand on, while at the same time challenging us to creative expanding, deepening, enriching, and transforming. And all of those relationships exist within the ocean of our common relationship with God and under God’s continual beckoning, invitation, accompaniment, and love. So, we can think of “home” as our powerful nexus for creative becoming – whether that nexus is in our immediate families, in a group of close friends, or in a broader chosen community like the Church of the Village.

Of course, we have the places where we sleep, keep our belongings, cook, wash clothes, etc. But home is different. “Home” is not necessarily where we do all of those domestic things. That’s a house, not always “home.” In our first imaginings gathering for this Sunday, Dwight said “home” for him, at this point in his life, is right here at the Church of the Village on Sundays, from 9am to 1pm. This is where his family is at this moment in his life. It is where he loves and is loved in return. He said, “Come hell or high waters, I always have Sunday morning here. That’s home. There is a beauty and hope and strength in that. No matter what else happens, I can count on that support from God, who I talk to every day, and the love of people I’m surrounded by on Sundays.”

Moreover, “home” not always harmonious. In fact, if our lives were filled only with harmony, it would feel shallow and limited. At their best, our relationships and our sense of home bring together harmony with intensity of experience. In our “home” relationships – usually the closest and most important ones we have – there will inevitably be tensions, disagreements, and conflict. Yet, these are important since they, too, help us to grow. They encourage us to celebrate different perspectives and diversity of lived experience that help move us toward richer and more complex thriving and becoming.

And God is always in the midst of our relationships – with humans and with other living beings. The Persian poet, Hafiz, captured God’s relationship with humans and with the whole of creation, when he wrote, “[God] addressed my heart, revealing a sublime truth to the world, when [She] sang, “I am made whole by your life. Each soul, each soul completes Me.”  God is in us and we are in God. We are each a part of God and each of our relationships is a part of God. God is in each of our moments of being and experience and in every moment of every relationship we have. Therefore, we can equally say, in both a very intimate and a huge cosmic sense, that God is our home and we are God’s home. That’s why I said earlier that these two understandings of God are completely intertwined. It’s not that we have one “home” here with all of our companions and friends and another “home” in God. They are one “home.”

Sometimes, it can be hard for us to hold on to the truth that we are always in God and God is in us. But that is exactly what I am encouraging us to do. To remember that every moment you feel joy, God is in the joy with you. When we are lifted up together in worship, God experiences being lifted with us. Whitehead called God, “the fellow sufferer who understands.” God is in our suffering, sadness, and pain too.

Many of you know that Diane has been in the hospital now for nearly three weeks. And I have spent most of my days at her side the whole time and for several weeks before as she has struggled with this serious illness. Some things have improved, but her health and prognosis are still precarious. In the midst of all of this, I have been reminded of the many “homes” Diane and I are blessed to have – multiple nexuses of deep relationships demonstrated in the outpouring of love, support, offers to help, and so on. I have also experienced the ways the love Diane and I share has deepened in the experience of her physical distress, increasing weakness, and fear that she might not survive this. And I feel very strongly God in the mix – beckoning all of us to experience the depths and heights of compassion, tenderness, love, and beauty at all times, including under very challenging circumstances.

The composer of Psalm 90 wrote, “God you have been our home for all generations.” I think we need to extend that to say “God, you are our home and we are your home,” for, as the chant says that we often sing here, “I am in you and you are in and we are in God…and God is in us.”

Copyright (c) 2023 - Rev. Jeff Wells
All rights reserved.

Reflection question: 
What do you think of these ideas about “home” and what has been your own experience of home?

[1] - Source: https://www.lyricsondemand.com/tvthemes/cheerslyrics.html