what do i want to be when i grow up?

January 29, 2023 • Fourth Sunday after Epiphany
Scripture Reading: Micah 6:6-8 (The Inclusive Bible)
Rev. Alexis Lillie

“Don’t ask what the world needs, ask what makes you come alive, because what the world needs is more people who have come alive.”
-- Howard Thurman

 I have kind of a love/hate relationship with this quote! It actually would drive me crazy, when I was trying to figure out what I wanted to "be when I grew up," when people would say, “Well what would you do if you could do anything??”

Or, in Thurman's words, “What would you do if you could do what makes you come alive?!”

Like that would somehow solve the problem. That was the problem -- I didn't know!! I had hobbies and a full life, and a job I even liked, but I didn't have a particular passion or sense a calling, except that I wanted to do something meaningful. But who doesn't want that for their life?

When we consider this question, "What do you want to be when you grow up," or "what makes you come alive,” some people are like me (or my early-20's self) want to run and hide. And some have had a deep clarity their whole lives. Some of us find a certainty later in life, and then that certainty may even ebb and change. Some of us may still find these conversations to be anxiety-producing, for a whole host of reasons. 

What I'm inviting us to, just for a few moments today, is to try to loosen our grip on figuring it out. We're going to examine some ideas, but I would never claim that the point of scripture, or a sermon, or even life is to "figure it out" in the linear, literal sense! So if you're already feeling anxious, like I would be if I'd seen the title of this sermon or heard its beginning 20 years ago, take a breath. 

Let's all take a breath. 

Let's try to de-couple ourselves from this emphasis on doing, on our productivity, from "what do you want to be”, from a cultural fixation on the 40-hour job. Because that is essentially what people are asking when they ask that question.

God tells God's people in our passage today, how God is hoping they'll spend their time, what God hopes will make them come alive. They're in a bit of a different situation here -- they're not really addressing some of the existential angst inherent in the questions we've been talking about. So I don't want to extrapolate out too far for our purposes without being true to the context. 

The book of Micah, where this text is found, has some interesting things happen in it. At this point in Israel's history, divisions have caused them to split into two separate "kingdoms.” Things in the northern area or Israel, and the southern kingdom of Judah -- on slightly different timelines -- are not going well. 

Micah is written largely to the people in this divided, maybe disparate, not-going-well period.  This period spans a long time, because people from Judah -- where Micah lives -- are conquered, taken captive and deported, go on to live among their captors in Babylon, and eventually (generations later), some return to their original land and begin rebuilding. 

That’s like the extreme cliffs notes version of the rise and fall and return of the kingdoms of Israel and Judah! Scholars think Micah was assembled across these time periods, perhaps that the "original" prophecies of an actual prophet Micah, were worked and re-worked by others to make them relevant to their context. 

I love this!! I love that within the text we already get examples of how it's to be used, and cracked open, and recycled, and re-applied to context, after context, after context. And, by the way, this sort of thing happens all the time in scripture. It's kind of a really important part of Jewish interpretation of sacred text to make them speak to our time now.

I say all this for a couple reasons. I think it's important to be as faithful to the text and the context as we can, especially before we go applying something to our lives. And we figure out from doing this work, that applying it is exactly what we should be doing. It's what the Jewish people are doing in this passage. They're taking sayings and teachings from their scriptures, from their prophets, and making them relevant for where they're at. 

In the midst of all the stuff that led up to the division of Israel, and perhaps contributed to their exile to Babylon, they're asking deep questions. We see that in this passage. So perhaps, it is addressing some existential angst! They're wondering -- what do we need to do to get our groove back. In this specific case, they're curious about how to get back the harmonious relationship they had with the divine presence in their midst. And really -- and this is where our own "recycling" of the text happens -- these are questions at the core about belonging, and meaning, and doing impactful things in the world.

We may be asking how do we get our groove back, or how do we get it in the first place? How do we discern "what makes me come alive?" or "what do I want to be when I grow up?" And within these deep questions in whatever form they take -- ancient or modern -- God's answer comes through the prophet, through the lens of what the community needs: To live an impactful life, we need to do justice, love mercy -- give ourselves on behalf of others -- and walk humbly, or be in a groove with God. 

That's it. 

Is this helping your anxiety? I'm sort of joking / not joking! I understand that fears and concerns and worries around these questions can be quite strong! And this "answer" from God about how those in divine relationship could spend their time, is not simple! But the interesting thing is ... these are things we can do, no matter our circumstances. No matter how we're spending the hours in our week. 

Some people spend most of their days doing things that explicitly look like justice, and mercy, and humility. Others of us, not so much. Still others of us, it may take us a while to "figure out" what it looks like for us to act with justice and mercy and humility. And then when we've "figured it out," those ways of being may stop making sense, and it may shift into something else. 

My 20-something-year-old self was fixated on doing something "meaningful."  That’s not a bad thing to be fixated on, sure, but I was expecting it to look a certain way. Like working for specific organizations, or traveling overseas on justice work. But when I stopped fixating, and started trying to live more justly and lovingly no matter my context, I gained a lot more freedom and contentment, and honestly more purpose. 

Yes, I ended up doing work that some might say is explicitly impactful. And how I got here is another story! But along the way - and even now - I had plenty of opportunities to find a groove as best I could, no matter my circumstances. To explore these justice / kindness / humility elements within a situation that maybe wasn't my first choice. 

I love that as the people in Judah are trying to find their groove with God, God answers them with things they can do no matter what, and that emphasize the importance of community. While we can find ways to be just and merciful and humble regardless of "what we want to be when we grow up," we cannot do those things in a vacuum. So yes, this work is very personal, but it is necessitated by community, and doing it well requires community. 

As we move into a time of reflection, I'm going to invite you to think personally and communally. Instead of having our conversations around the table, today, I invite you to take a few moments to turn inward and consider these questions ~

• Within the way you currently spend your time, where are there opportunities to do justice, love mercy, and walk humbly? 

• What would that look like in your day-to-day routine, with others around you.

Copyright (c) 2023 - Alexis Lillie
All rights reserved.

            201 West 13th Street, New York, NY 10011               
212.243.5470